Jesus, MY Jesus! 

“I pray that the Father of glory, the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, would impart to you the riches of the Spirit of wisdom and the Spirit of revelation to know Him through your deepening intimacy with Him” (Ephesians 1:17; TPT). 

Dearest Jesus,

Just the mention of Your name makes my heart leap with endless jubilee: You are Jesus, my Jesus and how I love Thee! From the banks of my heart flows a silent stream, a running river pouring into every part of my being. It’s waters are sweeter than honey to my soul, more moving in stillness than the wild waves of the sea in all their motion. Like the tide is drawn away from the shore to the outstretched horizon hovering over the great deep, my heart is drawn into the depths of Your Word – that sweet swell softly breaking over me. Big are the billows of wisdom found in that blessed Book, and bountiful are the invitations to rest near Your quiet brook. Many more than me have been wholly overtaken by its ceaseless revelation of a Man named Jesus, the joy and pride of all creation. Yet, this wonder leaves me to unbrokenly ponder: You not merely desire to be revealed as Jesus to all, but the longing of Your heart is to be revealed to me, my Jesus, my prized Possession and my sole treasure unto eternity. Oh Jesus, like Moses, I dare ask, show me Thy glory, permit me a step closer to Thy Person, allow my heart to know Thee more! Only then will I be satisfied to the full, still the end of my pleasure is the start of my ache – a desire for deeper intimacy with Thee, the quest my heart dares to take. May I know Thee more?


I’ve searched restlessly in every space in relentless pursuit of my Saviour’s warm embrace. My heart has sought the pleasure of Thy presence, waiting in worship for the shadow of the Almighty to shield my soul. Still, the path of my pilgrimage to Thy glory starts with a single step – a deep drink of Scripture that washes away all of me, becoming a fount of Living Water, the holy heartbeat of no other than Thee. Though at first my flesh contends against the Spirit’s wholehearted desire to be drawn to the cleft of Your wounded side, grace gives me sufficient strength to pursue in my seek, to read and read and read until my heart hears Thy unbroken Scriptures speak. Indeed the mind wants to walk and wander in its own lonesome ways of worry and fear, but as soon as my holy expedition is marked by perseverance enabled by Thy Holy Spirit, my soul knows You are near. A treasure of truth I’ve found and I will guard: the glorious Presence of Your Person is hidden within Your everlasting Word and it is Your committed enthusiasm that we discover that gentle Breeze, that soft blow of a Kiss and the tender Touch of Your Spirit. Only then will the ever-reigning Jesus be revealed to each personally, the separate human heart be stamped by deepening intimacy. Your sole question stands as sure as the treasure it promises: will you search for me with all Your heart? You will find me. And the very start? Place your foot into the shore of Scripture and allow my Holy Spirit to draw you farther into that blessed sea of stillness as you float in faith in Me.


Once I’ve passed the billows of the flesh – that abhorrent thing that rebels against anything pleasantly perfect, that loathsome thing that strives against the Scripture – I find myself basking in that still sea of Your divine Word, utterly immersed in verse and verse. Suddenly the writings are made to breathe and becomes my breath in me. Out of the many wonders that my eyes behold Thy Spirit illuminates a few, a glistening gold message engraved on my heart to me from You. Floating in faith I find myself without a flicker of doubt, my heart in the hold of Thy glorious hand, adrift in the great sea of awe, seperated from the shallowness of shore and sand. When I’m tucked in tight between the pages of that blessed Book, the Holy Spirit helps me to see Jesus with His smiling eyes aglow and ablaze, the written Word suddenly vividly alive – the Person of Christ so clear, so real that all else becomes no more; wonderfully gently comes His knock on my heart’s door. I open as I yield and Thy Holiness draws nigh and Thy Living Waters start streaming from my innermost being and a beautiful surrender defeats that effortful try. At once I’m looking within, through the eyes of Thy Spirit that gives plenty more than I could ever ask, and I can see Jesus, my Jesus – my heart’s closest Friend. From whence I’ve started at the shore fighting against the flesh, Your blessed Spirit has drawn me into the deep waters of Scripture that washes away all of me and I’m lost in the depths of deepening intimacy!

Abba Father, I draw near to You in Jesus – Your perfect Son and my sweet Saviour. Holy Spirit permit me Your eyes and ears and teach my lips what they ought to say, that a sweet-smelling fragrance may come before my Heavenly Father as I praise and pray. Humbly I come and sit at Your feet as my heart is filled with more than happiness, a joy to the full, as I look upon my Jesus, my Jesus, my only lasting Love. Holy Spirit make Jesus so real to every reader as they take that single step from the shore to the sea, fill their eyes with faith that they may see and see. Dearest Father, draw near to them as they draw nigh, let every heart know they are Your sweet delight and the apple of Thine eye. Help us, precious Holy Spirit, in our pursuit of knowing our blessed Saviour, to search and seek the Scriptures endlessly as we stay afloat in building faith. Make Jesus so real to every reader that they may feel His gentle touch; help them to look within and find the very source of living Love. And finally, I pray, Jesus, be their Jesus, each one’s dearest Friend, grant them the heart to know that You want them to know You without end! “I pray that the Father of glory, the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, would impart to you the riches of the Spirit of wisdom and the Spirit of revelation to know Him through your deepening intimacy with Him” (Ephesians 1:17; TPT). 


Annaliese Smal

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